why can't i

It was so unexpected. The moment I heard the mention of your name my heart had started pounding. I like to think that I have no idea why it'd started racing, but to be honest, I know exactly why. I guess all this time I thought it was all over. It could never be. It would never be. So why has this doomed desire been lingering amongst my thoughts? I guess it was never really over in my head; I'd blurred the line between wishful thinking and reality.

Reality. It can be such a bitch sometimes. The next thing I'm going to talk about is a reference to a scene in 500 Days Of Summer. It showcases the typically experienced reality vs. expectations situation. Where your expectations - no matter how hard you wish - never fall parallel to reality. ...well for me at least.

So I guess after countless plans that have panned out to be a reality vs. expectation event, I have come to the conclusion to never expect anything. Or anything of anyone in this case. Because if you continue to rely your happiness to unfold accordingly to your expectations, you're only getting your heart torn apart - bit, by bit. If it hasn't already been ripped out, that is.

procrastination

proʊˈkræs təˌneɪt - The act of postponing, delaying or putting off, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness


Pretty much the source and fuel to my procrastination.
Its funny because I will find myself sitting here at the computer around 8pm. "Alright, I'll just check out facebook and youtube for five minutes and then I'll hit the books."
*looks down at time*
10.30pm. Great.

So yes, I have created a study schedule - but have I followed it accordingly?
Can't say I have to be honest.
With that in mind, I have planned to get up at 6.30am EVERY morning.
Be out the house by 7.10am.
Get to school before 8 so I can get some solid studying down.

Let's all hope I actually follow this plan from now on. Although I can already see Winter hitting Melbourne in June (when i assume exams will commence for Semester One) and at 6.31am, I will be in bed; dreading the contact between my skin and the freezing atmosphere.

cee-blains

Claire Blainey.
Yes she is quite the quirky petite fille, but at the end of the day I tell myself,
"HANG IN THERE FREDA, YOU'RE ONLY NICE TO HER CAUSE SHE HAS NO FRIENDS !"
I'm jokinggggg claire !
You know I love you (L)

...despite how tall you are :P

plan

The work ethic I can only hope to achieve this year:

4:00-5:30 ~ Free Time/ Binge Eat/ Shower

From this point, No Facebook, No MSN, No episode of ANYTHING

5:30-7:30 ~ Study Time
7:30-8:30 ~ Dinner Time/ Free Time
8:30-10:30 ~ Study Time
10:30-- ~ FREE TIME !! (Yes, I can finally social network)
:)

heart throb

ZOMGOSH !
Joseph Vincent is my newest discovery. Well actually a friend showed me his cover of "Replay" -IYAZ and I am actually inlove. Can he be anymore cuter?
Check him out yourself :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPoWV6wOggE

the dance

Weary and worn
Little monster is born
Tell me lies and I'll justify them
I'm desperate today and it's making me pay
For that night, for that kiss, for your bed

Oh why (why)
Can't (can't)
You take me in your arms now?
Why (why)
Can't (can't)
You take me?
Why (why)
Can't (can't)
You take me in your arms now?
Why (why)
Can't (can't)
You take me?